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Friday, July 26, 2024

Thank You, Jack



     Jack Connors doesn’t need me to eulogize him. His passing made headlines in the local newspapers and nightly news. At the end of this, I will link to his obituary for those who might have no idea who he is.
     In short, he was a legend in Boston-based advertising and a dominating force in philanthropy for decades. Money, fame, respect, he had it all. So no, Jack doesn’t need me to eulogize him. So I’m not going to.
     Instead what I am going to do is tell a little story about the Jack Connors that I knew and that I owed so much to.
     My first introduction to Jack occurred in 2006. He had a summer home near the Marshside Restaurant where I had worked in Dennis on Cape Cod for years. Jack was a frequent patron of our rustic but beloved establishment. It was a homey place with delicious food that ran the gamut from pancakes and lobster rolls to prime rib and turkey clubs. We had a staff that was more like family, many of us working together for ten or more years.


Closing time at the original Marshside



     I describe the Marshside in this way not just because it’s how I feel, but because it’s how Jack felt. This came into play when the opportunity came for him to buy the restaurant.
     Now, I was not privy to why Marylou who had owned it for decades was selling. I knew our building needed a good amount of work. We sometimes skated by on inspections due to people knowing people. And don’t get me started about our barn across the parking lot which doubled as a prep room and food storage area. That being said the restaurant was always immaculately clean and we all took great pains to keep things that way on the inside even if the outside looked like it might fall over.
     Whatever her reason was Marylou and Jack made a deal in 2007. He would buy the Marshside and be essentially a silent owner while Marylou continued to run the day-to-day operations. Whether it had been dire straits for the business or not it would continue on thanks to Jack.
     This is where the true measure of who Jack was as a person became apparent to us who worked there.
     The staff was told by Marylou of the plans. The Marshside was being sold to Jack with her staying on in basically a General Manager role. We would close at the end of August. After that, the rustic clam shack was to be torn down with a new more modern restaurant arising in its place in time for the following summer.


Some of the crew from those final days of the original Marshside



     We made plans for a big final shindig at the old Marsh. Everything must go. We closed that night for service and then ate, drank, were merry, and took nearly everything that wasn’t nailed down. I still have counter chairs and glass fish plates kids used to this day. We also took food and of course booze(open bottles only). I mean hey it was going to be thrown away right? I only took a bottle of Jack Daniels.
     The next week all that was left of the Marshside was a hole in the ground. Even the barn that had served as our prep room and food storage area was torn down.
     But what of us? What of the loyal staff?
     Before we left on the day that Marylou had first announced the sale of the restaurant she asked me, and several others if we planned on coming back when the new place opened. I said yes. That is when my mind was blown.
     She told me that the plan was for Jack to pay me, full-time, for the entire time the restaurant was being rebuilt. I was to be paid to stay at home. Out of sheer kindness and respect this man who didn’t know us really, or owe us anything, was going to spend likely what amounted to easily over six figures to keep us on for when the new Marshside opened.


Standing in the hole where the Marshside once stood



     He didn’t have to do that. Jack could have easily let us all go and brought in his own staff. He surely knew some heavy hitters in the Boston restaurant scene that could have helped launch his new venture. But no, he lived up to his word.
     I was paid a 40-hour salary for what ended up being nine months. Nine. Months.
     This allowed me the opportunity to write several books and spend countless afternoons at the Cape Cod Community College library. This was thanks to Jack.
     Now, don’t get me wrong, as much as I knew it would end I had days where I wished I could just live the life of a writer getting paid and hanging out in the library. When the time came to reopen in June I was there.
     I vividly remember sitting in the sparkling new restaurant with the rest of the crew. Jack held court and gave us the rundown of what was to happen from that moment on. He also explained why he undertook this endeavor.
     In what I would come to really appreciate Jack gave a very dry humorous explanation. He said he was looking for new ways to lose money. We had no idea at the time that it had already cost him several million dollars to go from a clam shack to a modern casual dining establishment. Sure it hardly made a dent in his overall wealth, but that’s a large chunk of change.
     I cannot say for sure but I believe it took at least a few years for the restaurant to turn a profit for Jack.

     We on the staff definitely earned some of the money Jack had paid during the time off during those first weeks of reopening. I know that I worked 110 hours in that first week alone. That’s no typo, and that was a lot of overtime. Roughly 8am to 11pm, give or take, every day. Still, we did it because it was our form of payback for Jack’s confidence in us.
     Then came a hard left turn. In the spring of 2010 Marylou, our leader, our guiding light, and one of the hardest-working people I’ve ever known, suddenly passed away. This took Jack from a silent owner to having to be right on the front lines. There is no way it was what he wanted or expected, but he did it out of respect for Marylou.


Before opening at the new Marshside



     The 2010 season was tough, but we all banded together and made it through for Marylou. After that though, after the care and respect that Jack showed us. After he continued the Marshside when he could have easily said ‘This isn’t working for me,’ and sold it or closed it. I can only speak for myself but I know I stayed to return the favor of respect to Jack.
     Despite being worth a staggering amount of money. Despite being known and respected throughout the country. Despite having the option to be the stereotypical ‘rich man’ Jack went the opposite way. He would come into the restaurant through the kitchen like the staff, making a point to shake hands or hug everyone he crossed paths with.
     Jack would make you feel important when he had no obligation to. He did it because he was a decent human. He wasn’t born rich and I think that helped him remember that we all are humans doing the best we can to navigate through life.
     I ended up staying working in the kitchen at the Marshside for much longer than I intended to. This boiled down to two things. One was my true and honest feelings that those I worked with, especially those I worked with for many years, were family and I owed it to them. The second thing was the gratitude to Jack.
     I don’t know if the Marshside needed saving when he bought it. If it did or didn’t the bottom line is that it is still going strong today because of the work and the money he put into it. His legacy is so far beyond rebuilding the Marshside, but to me, that is his defining achievement because it affected me personally.





     I kept my job because of Jack. I was paid, full-time, to sit at home for nine months because of Jack. I learned that wealth doesn’t have to make you a cold and uncaring person because of Jack. I called him Mr. Connors the first time I met him but he softly insisted I call him Jack.
     I was honestly surprised at how much hearing that he had died hit me, but I shouldn’t have been. Just how he approached us in the days after Marylou’s death earned him all of the loyalty and respect I could offer.
     There are so many who knew Jack far better than me. He had a wonderful family, at least who I met, and my heart goes out to them, especially his wife Eileen. Like I said at the top, Jack Connors doesn’t need me to eulogize him, and his family doesn’t need me to either. That being said it can’t hurt for them to hear how Jack positively affected me, and I’m just some random line cook who happened to work at his happiest ‘money loser’ that he had.
     I will end this off by simply saying thank you Jack for everything. You lived a great and important life sir, rest in peace.


c. Camp Harbor View.org

Jack Connors Obituary

Wednesday, July 24, 2024

In My Footsteps Podcast Episode 154: The Lady of the Dunes at 50: A Look At Cape Cod's Most Infamous Murder Case(7-24-2024)

 


50 years ago in July 1974, Ruth Marie Terry, the woman who would be known as The Lady of the Dunes for most of that time, was murdered and left in the remote dunes of the Province Lands in Provincetown, Massachusetts on Cape Cod.
Longtime listeners of the podcast know of my connection to this case. I wrote a book, Searching for the Lady of the Dunes, which I released in February 2023. I was deeply connected with the Lady of the Dunes documentary produced by Frank Durant.
Before that, I grew up with the story of the Lady of the Dunes living on Cape Cod. I could never have imagined being even a peripheral part of the eventual solution to this infamous case.
As the 50th anniversary of this event has arrived, I want to give a crash course in all things Lady of the Dunes. For the last year-plus, I have been giving talks about the case, the documentary, and of course my book. This is an abridged version of what those who come to my speaking engagements hear.
For those who are unfamiliar with this case and my involvement. If you want more, I have several videos I made while working on the book and Frank’s documentary, all available on my YouTube channel.
For more great content become a subscriber on Patreon!

Helpful Links from this Episode

Listen to Episode 153 here 

Friday, July 19, 2024

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #26: 90210, The Entitled Karen Show, Turkey Fighting Mailman, etc




1. Sadly this past week actress Shannen Doherty lost her battle with cancer. She was only 53. It’s especially jarring being someone who used to watch Beverly Hill 90210 with my sister Kate to see now that both Shannen Doherty and Luke Perry are gone. Both Brenda and Dylan. So sad, rest in peace.


2. Well it only took until July 14th to see the first Back to School ad. This was for Walmart. Now I understand that some schools in other areas of the country start the year earlier, but where I live it’s the standard week after Labor Day. Making it more than 7 weeks until kids go back to school. In fact, I think most kids got out of school about 3 weeks ago meaning that they’re way less than ½ way through their summer vacation and already being reminded of going back to school. Soon companies will start their back-to-school campaigns before the current year even ends.


Coming soon to a school near you.



3. In the latest episode of the Entitled Karen show I was at 7/11 grabbing a drink on my way to work. There was a decent line for registers but nobody was using the one self-checkout register. The woman ahead of me in line shouted out to see if anyone was going to use it and when everyone said no she went up. She was in trouble when she tried to scan a 12-pack of White Claws at the self-checkout. It needed her to show an ID to someone. Naturally, she got frustrated at such inconvenience. Eventually, she groaned and yelled out that she ‘gave up’ to one of the cashiers and walked out. She left all of her stuff there like a jerk of course. I went up, scanned my drink, and handed the White Claw case to the cashier, and was done in 30 seconds.


4. It was so flattering to hear from an old friend who was working at a library. They said a woman came in looking for books on historic Cape Cod places. When my books were recommended not only had she read them all, she was a regular listener to my podcast, and wanted to be a writer herself. I’m not saying I am an inspiration to her but it’s humbling to think maybe something I’ve done in my career is driving someone else to do something in theirs.


5. At the Stop & Shop supermarket chain they charge you 10 cents for paper bags. No biggie, I have a pile of reusable bags so it doesn’t affect me. I see loads of other shoppers bringing their own recyclable bags with them as well. However this week on back-to-back days I saw 2 different people bring in a cardboard box and use that for their groceries. They literally walked around the store holding a cardboard box. It’s one part clever, one part stupid as hell. I found myself laughing and shaking my head at both of them.


6. A woman came into my work needing shockwave therapy on a sore plantar fascia and calf. The Cliff's Notes is that shockwave therapy is a non-invasive treatment that stimulates the body’s natural healing process. It can relieve pain and promote healing of injured tendons, ligaments, and other soft tissues. Anyway, she came in with this cute little puppy that adored her. Unfortunately, the shockwave therapy machine and the process are relatively loud. Rather than having the puppy watch its owner getting this treatment and possibly yelling as it can be a bit painful to start, I chose to have the puppy kept outside of the room. No need to scar a puppy for life if it can be avoided.


7. I can’t watch ‘Best Kills’ of the Friday the 13th series before bed and then pretend to be surprised when my dream consists of me having to defeat Jason in a sort of living video game. Luckily in this dream, my 2 weapons that did the trick were shining a bright light in his face, and pushing him out the door, and locking it behind him. Why didn’t any of those teens in the movies try those?


In my dreams Jason can't use doors apparently



8. Speaking of dreams, does anyone ever have a dream about a person they hadn’t seen, or even thought of, in over 30 years? The other night I dreamed I was at a party but the host was a kid I went to elementary school with. I hadn’t thought of him or heard his name in probably 30 years, but now it’s front and center in my brain. Maybe I should find him and reach out?


9. I noticed this week that one of the Shaw’s supermarkets on Cape Cod has put up a sign banning dogs from the store since it’s a health violation. My first thought was ‘do people really need to be told not to bring pets into a grocery store?’ This was never an issue all throughout my growing up. Dogs stayed in cars or at home. Service dog? Maybe. Regular pet? You might need therapy because you’ve got some bigger issues.


No longer to be seen at Shaw's



10. I never thought a specific automobile could make my Enemies List if I had one, but it happened this week. I was driving home and while making a left turn was cut off by a gray Volkswagen Tiguan SUV. It whipped around me and was so dangerous that the car in front of me pulled over and waved those jerks to let them pass. No more than 5 minutes later I was going straight at a light when a car in the Right Turn Only lane swerved in front of me because they were too stupid to know how to read traffic signs. That vehicle was another gray VW Tiguan. That’s right 2 of the same exact vehicle cut me off within 5 minutes. Do dealerships sell those SUVs specifically to certain types of people?


11. I had a great speaking event at the Osterville Library this week talking about my book Cape Cod Nights. The library parking lot was full though thanks to an art show on the front lawn. I ended up parking on the next street over. Even though I was told I’d be fine there during my event there was a little part of my brain expecting to either have a ticket on my windshield when I went back out, or my car would have just been towed. No worries though, everything was fine.


12. In a fun bit of local celebrity meeting one of the people that came to my event in Osterville after the talk revealed himself to be the legendary mailman whose truck was attacked by turkeys on camera back in 2011. It went viral and he was a sensation for a while. So now I can say I’ve met the turkey-fighting mailman and the guy who got swallowed by the humpback whale. What a life I live.

Turkey Attacks Mail Truck

Wednesday, July 17, 2024

In My Footsteps Podcast Episode 153: The Oregon Trail PC Game; What Ended McDonaldland?; Shocking Razzie Nominated Musicians; Tom & Jerry(7-17-2024)

 


Don't catch dysentery on the Oregon Trail. What spelled doom for McDonaldland? Some of the most accomplished musicians nominated for a Golden Raspberry Award.
Episode 153 brings all the nostalgia you could possibly want.
The show kicks off with a favorite memory of many school-aged kids of the 1980s and 1990s. Oregon Trail was more than just a fun game that taught kids to avoid dysentery and to watch out for broken wagon wheels on the prairie. It was an educational game that helped teach critical thinking and encourage social interaction. We will take a deeper look at this classic game.
Years ago fast food restaurants catered toward the younger generation with colorful characters and bright cheery facades of their buildings. No establishment epitomized this as much as McDonald's. In the 1970s they revolutionized the way fast food was sold with their unique, and a bit trippy, McDonaldland. Then slowly it faded away. We go way Back In the Day to look at the events that led to the demise of McDonaldland.
Even the greatest of the great can have off days or perceived off days. In the new Top 5 we will look at some of the most beloved and accomplished musical acts ever, who also just happened to have been nominated for a Razzie Award for Worst Song.
There is also a new This Week In History and Time Capsule centered around the first official Tom and Jerry cartoon.
For more great content become a subscriber on Patreon!

Helpful Links from this Episode

Listen to Episode 152 here