Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #139: The Cabin Movie Shoot Day 2

1. I began the fourth day of my time in rural north central Pennsylvania by downing an energy drink and trying my best to wake up quickly before exiting the motel room to head over to Wellsboro to meet the rest of the crew. I found it amazing how fast my body will wake up when I have fun and exciting things on my schedule. If it was a typical work day, my body would have been like a Ziploc bag full of oatmeal. Yet, there I was on that morning, very tired but fully awake because of the adrenaline that kicked in as soon as my eyes opened. Each filming morning required me to be at Director Mark’s house in the next town over from where I was staying by 8:15am. No matter what time I managed to fall asleep, I was alive and kicking by 6:30am at the latest.


2. This was the first day that we would all be heading to the cabin to shoot. We were lucky in that Mark knew someone with a cabin nearly in the middle of nowhere. They were willing to allow us to use it for nothing. We had gone a few nights earlier to clean the cabin to get it camera-ready. That day, we packed up gear, loaded the food I had bought at Walmart, picked up anyone who needed to carpool, and started the journey to the tiny township of Osceola. I thought Mansfield was small, with a population of just under 3,000. Nothing prepared me for Osceola. Its population is under 600. On each of the drives out to the cabin, we would pass by many dilapidated houses. These looked like if you got a flat and needed to ask for help, you’d be shot before your foot touched the grass on the edge of their property. In fact, there was one time when Mark had to stop to wait for another car to catch up. I was carpooling with him. I was on my guard as we parked in front of one of these sketchy houses. When a person stepped out onto their porch, I was ready to duck and cover. There were never any issues with anyone on the drives out to the cabin, but it felt like the threat was always there.


3. A daily highlight on my drives, not only to the cabin, but just around where I was in Pennsylvania, was the fog and clouds. The elevation in the area ranges from 1,000 to 2,000 feet, and so there were times, especially in the morning, when the fog and clouds would be right at eye level or just above. We get tons of fog on Cape Cod; the spring is the worst of it. However, I hadn’t seen it hovering just off the ground, the same with the clouds. I couldn’t get any photos while I was driving, but managed to grab one while on a drive out to the cabin on that first day of shooting. It won’t do justice to how cool it was, but it’s better than nothing. Mark told me that the fog/clouds and the heat lightning that I found so exciting were so routine that it didn’t even faze him. I guess it’s the same as how I feel about the summer traffic on Cape Cod. No, wait, that’s never exciting or fun.

Looking at the fog on the horizon traveling toward Osceola.

4. The cabin itself was an interesting character not only in the film but for my trip in general. I mentioned the obnoxious amount of stuffed animals inside, and not the cuddly ones kids have on their beds. We arrived and, first off, had to turn on the power. This would come into play a few times throughout the shoot. There was a breaker for the pump, which allowed us to have running water. Not wanting to overdo it, we would only flip the switch for short bursts periodically when we needed to use water or the bathroom. I was honestly fine with just wandering off behind some bushes, but I know that’s not for everyone. We unpacked the food and set up the props, lighting, and scenery we needed. Even though we were only there for two full days, it did feel like we were arriving at an Airbnb. There were a few perishable items we brought: meat, cheese, and bottled water, so we had to shove them in the fridge. Surprisingly, the fridge was full. We didn’t get too excited, though; it was mostly condiments and copious amounts of beer, which I am sure the cabin owners had counted. There would be some time to explore the cabin thoroughly, but once we had everything settled, it was time to dive right into shooting.

A pano shot showing how isolated we were.

5. It’s funny, regarding the trip in general, I can tell how busy the days were by just how many photos and videos I got. This day was the busiest by far, with the following day being only slightly less busy. It should come as no surprise that, since we were shooting at a cabin roughly a mile from anything that the cell reception was nearly nonexistent. I would get flashes of one bar of service, but it was never anything that allowed me to post any updates on social media. I was, for all intents and purposes, off the radar for two entire days. I still shot a handful of videos on this day. I even began uploading one to Instagram around 10:30am. By the time we left the cabin, which was close to 9pm, that story was maybe 30% uploaded. I ended up canceling that upload and throwing all of the footage up once I got back to my motel room and civilization.





6. Being that we had a small cast and a small budget, I had a feeling that I might end up with a role or two in the film. One came about by my own foolishness. I was checking over the script while still on Cape Cod, and on the first page, in the very first scene, I saw that there was a character that I never cast. It was another friend of Will, the main character, who is being given the lowdown about why he was quitting his job. Since I was pressed for time, I decided to just record those lines myself, so that was my first role. Secondly, I took on the role of an investigator near the end of the film. This was relatively small, so I wasn’t too worried about remembering lines. This role was memorable because it came with a costume. Mark’s son Anthony, who is such a sweet person and a very talented visual effects person, brought this hefty trench coat with him. I agreed to wear it in my role as the investigator. The trench coat was memorable for two reasons. For one, it was 85 degrees and humid, so wearing it was like having a portable sauna. Secondly, it was too big. I looked like a five-year-old who got into daddy’s clothes. All I could do was laugh when the cameras weren’t rolling, of course. I was so inspired by the incredible acting jobs that Cody and Jeff did that I took on some extra lines and lightened the load for Michael, who played another police officer. A funny thing that won’t come through in the film is that my character was interacting with Cody’s character in a scene. The only issue was Cody had to run home to let his dog out. So we shot my scene with me interrogating an empty chair off-screen. I got really intense too. I hope I scared that invisible ghost I was yelling at.

7. As far as my roles in The Cabin go, we save the best for last. My third role ended up being that of the mysterious creature that stalks the main character. Coming into the shoot, I don’t think any of us had a clue who would be in that role. I had brought the outfit for the creature from my own closet. Anthony had made the mask. So we had the creature costume but nobody to play it. I didn’t need to have my arm twisted too much to play the role. For one, it had no dialogue, just a lot of growls, grunts, and howls. Also, it was another perfect full-circle moment. When I used to make skits with my friends with my camcorder in the 1990s, I enjoyed being a bit of a stuntman. I would fall and throw myself around to make things look good. Granted, I was now 30 years older, but how much different could it be? The answer was very similar but also very different. I had to get made up in the monster garb, which included a horrifying mask with one tiny eye hole for sight. There were also copious amounts of blood to make me look as gross as possible. A fun little issue came after nearly every scene where the neck of the mask needed to be tucked back into the collar of the shirt I was wearing. I looked a bit like a cross between Jason from Friday the 13th Part 4 and Sloth from The Goonies. The setup was all good to go, but could I pull off being the creature?


8. Yes. But seriously, we shot the initial monster scenes at night, and so with very little vision I had to basically use The Force to make my way around. This included crashing through a door, killing one person convincingly with no real way to see them, and then viciously trying to bash my way through another door. I was told that my performance terrified the others. Mark said as he was filming that he thought I was going to really break the door down, but he didn’t want to stop me. I left blood all over the cabin, some of which we wouldn’t find until it was time for us to pack up and leave. The initial crashing through the door was nuts. I went all out. Not being able to see much in the dark and with a quarter-sized eye hole made it easy for me to appear to be wild. I was throwing chairs, growling, and causing utter chaos. The only downer was one guy whining that I got blood on his shirt. It’s like, you’re acting in a movie; nobody forced you to come. Later on, as we were all leaving, we saw him pulled over in his vehicle, changing his shirt. He must have had a date that he didn’t want to know what he was up to. I would have another crack at being the creature the next day, but we’ll get to that when the time arrives.


9. Throughout our time out at the cabin, I tried to manifest a nature encounter. I saw a few deer, including one that walked into the front yard to eat apples. There was a rabbit that really seemed to enjoy hanging out in the back yard by the shed. Those were all well and good, but what I wanted was a black bear. Oh, I’m sure if I had been jumped by a bear I’d have regretted asking for it, but I never got the chance. I didn’t go all out and start playing bear calls on my phone or anything, but we were in the middle of nowhere in bear country; I mean, come on. A few times I wandered up into this clearing behind the cabin hoping that I’d sneak up on a bear foraging for berries. Yes, I did think to myself how stupid and dangerous it was, but damn it, I wanted photos of Yogi doing stuff. The closest I got to a black bear while in Pennsylvania came when I was walking the bike trail earlier in the week. I heard some noises coming from maybe 20-30 feet in the woods off the trail. I figured it was either a group of squirrels or maybe a deer. Mark said it was more than likely a bear since they like to forage for food in areas like that. I never saw it, so there’s no proof, but Mark lives out there and would know better than me. Therefore, I am considering it a near-miss with a black bear. In the future, the story will evolve into me fighting for my life against the bear, which is why I was unable to get any photographic evidence.


10. There were several hilarious moments during our shooting at the cabin. One that only became funny after the fact was as follows. It was broad daylight, but we needed to get some night scenes done. This required some lighting trickery, including shooting day for night, which will mostly be applied during post-production. A more practical way to make day look like night is to cover windows with something black. We had a sheet that would do the trick. First, Anthony and I tried taping the sheet over the window from the inside. This was a failure and included us losing the tape as soon as we put it down, despite neither of us moving from where we stood. It ended up being wedged between the mattress and the side of the frame. We even sent Michael outside to see if somehow we dropped it out the window. The next bright idea was taping the sheet to a pair of lighting stands outside and raising it up to block the window. The sheet was taped, but as soon as we attempted to lift it, everything unraveled, and the sheet fell to the muddy ground. Yes, the ground was soft and muddy, which made everything else harder. Finally, Mark found a ladder, and we were able to nail the sheet to the window frame. It ended up being like a scene right out of the Three Stooges. It took five of us about a half hour to get that sheet in place. We nearly forgot to take it down when we were leaving too. I could only imagine the cabin owners showing up and seeing a window totally blacked out. They’d probably have started wondering what type of movie we had been shooting.

Three Stooges Seal of Approval

11. Being on a tight budget, you have to become creative. I wish we had a more robust budget to use on props and effects, but that wasn’t the case for The Cabin. In the script, there is a scene that includes the main character finding the dead deer. Sure, we could have found stock footage of a deer to put in post. But what made more sense was grabbing one of the many, many deer heads off the wall and using it as practical effects. I grabbed one, which weighed next to nothing, and brought it outside to lay in the grass. It ended up working perfectly. Cody came around the corner of the cabin and spotted the dead deer, brilliantly shot by Mark. In the script, it is supposed to be all bloodied up, but that probably can be done in post-production. We just needed the one shot and then to get it back on the wall no worse for wear. My greatest fear was that I had hung it back up improperly and that it had somehow fallen off the wall and been destroyed. I figure if that had happened, the cabin owner would have called Mark, and at least as of this writing, I have heard nothing about damaged deer heads.

The one in the middle was used in the film.

12. After a long day of filming, you can get hungry. Sure, we had a lot of food that I got from Walmart; that was part of the budget after all. But finger foods like granola bars, donuts, bags of chips, and even peanut butter and jelly sandwiches don’t fill you up unless you eat a ton all at once. I had been picking at stuff when we had the chance, so by the time we called ‘cut’ to end the day, which was close to 9pm, I was starving. As I was in Mark’s car, being brought back to his house where my rental was, my wheels were turning as far as where I could go to grab something quick for dinner. I only knew a few places along my driving route back to the motel. One was a McDonald’s located maybe two minutes from the motel. I decided, why not? I was technically on vacation, right? Something exciting, but also troublesome for me, that I discovered was the fact that I could pay for my food through the app using Venmo. Not only was everything slightly cheaper than on Cape Cod, but now I could just click one button, and it was paid. I grew up in the analog age of the 1980s and 1990s. Most things I learned about now require fewer steps, which I don’t mind. I think if you grew up before technology took over, you appreciate the advances. If you are born into a world where everything is simple and convenient, you likely don’t appreciate it. I didn’t think about that much while enjoying my late-night dinner, though. All I could do was eat and hope that my adrenaline wore off soon enough so that I could get a relatively good night’s sleep before another full day of filming.

I became very familiar with this spot

1996 Changed Everything: Pt. 5 - We'll Meet Again Old Friend

This is part of a series of articles about 1996, as it holds significance for me since it was the year I graduated high school. This fifth article is all about the friends we make, the friends we lose, and the friends we keep.

Thirty years ago I walked across a stage, strutting like pro wrestling icon Ric Flair, grabbed my diploma, and began the slow walk from childhood to manhood. My sister Kate recorded much of that graduation ceremony on my old Sears camcorder. I cherish every second of it.

Even today, as the young faces pass by the camera on that tape, I remember so many of them like they are frozen in time. I feel as though those people who held the greatest importance in my life back then still do today.

The classic 1986 film Stand By Me has an iconic quote at the end that sticks with me to this day. Richard Dreyfuss as Gordie types: "I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12. Jesus, does anyone?"

I wasn’t twelve when I graduated high school, but that line perfectly encapsulates how I feel about the friends I had back then. I’ve never had any like them since.

We were all learning and experiencing life for the first time together. We were succeeding, failing, laughing, loving, achieving, hurting, rebelling, being overwhelmed, and clinging on to each other as we rose and fell with the waves of teenage life. Those friends I made were not just friends; they were lifelong brothers and sisters.

When looking back at the people I called my friends as I graduated high school, I don’t look at a strict timeline. Many of those I’d have taken a bullet for I had already known for years by the time of caps and gowns. It was as if I already knew I’d found my tribe.

Doing some work in photography class.

Making friends is hard at any point in life. As an adult, it can feel like you’re applying for a job. As a kid, you’re putting yourself out there hoping that a stranger finds you worth getting to know better.

Being as shy and introverted as I was during my childhood, it’s a wonder I made any friends at all. Without luck, I’d have had to wait for a kickball to roll my way and use that as the opening to befriend whoever retrieved it.

My two oldest friends, Barry and Matt, came into my life through luck. Matt grew up across the street from me, and Barry happened to live a few doors down from my aunt. I’d go and visit her and invariably end up with Barry. I met both of them around the age of seven. Barry ended up being one of the most important and influential people in my life.

It’s interesting, as I sit here mining for memories going back 40 years, how I can’t remember those first meetings with people who went on to become chosen family. Oh sure, I can give you the Cliff’s Notes version of when someone crossed paths with me. I can share some early memories. However, the first meeting is a blur in virtually all of these cases. I guess you don’t realize that someone has become an integral part of your life until a certain amount of time has passed.

Hasan lived a few streets over from me. I know we bumped into each other during the summer before 6th grade. We built a bond like steel. He came from the city to Cape Cod and taught me about late 80’s/early 90s Hip-Hop. We played basketball. Rarely was it one-on-one because he’d crush me every time. So we’d do these two-against-zero games against opponents we called the ‘invisible ghosts.’

Tim lived further away, but our origin story is similar, revolving around a shared love of basketball. I remember sleepovers at his house often being punctuated by freshly made donuts the next morning by his parents. It was the Jerky Boys, walks through the woods to get to a nearby strip mall, and countless hours of me trying to figure out how to defend his patented ‘Fishy Swim’ fallaway jumper.

John I had seen around in middle school, but only when we sat next to each other in Freshman English did we connect. It was our just slightly wacky sense of humor that made us friends. I wish I still had my English notebook where we’d one-up each other with foolish lines and drawings, rarely paying attention to what the teacher said. To be honest, I would have had an easier time hearing an ant speak than that teacher, though.

Rob, much like Matt, happened to live close by. Our families were heavily intertwined, but it was only when I entered high school and bought a camcorder that we truly connected. He and I were the typical feral Gen Xers. Out all day on our bikes, going places we’d probably have needed permission to go, junk food, caffeine, crazy ideas, and laughs that brought tears.

Liam was another stroke of luck. We happened to work at the same job at the same time. Standing side by side with him, preparing food while music blasted loudly off the walls, ended up becoming some of my fondest memories of high school. Some funny lines we said back then we still bring up to this day.

There was a massive influx of new friends when I got to high school. My high school saw two neighboring towns’ middle schools combine into one blended family. It was an interesting transition. I played for the basketball team in middle school. A few of the new faces in the halls of the high school were once rivals on the other middle school team. It took a minute to realize we were all on the same team now.

New faces like Steve, Greg, Mike, Kevin, Pete, and others quickly went from strangers to major parts of my crew. Our interactions varied depending on the person. Greg, Mike, and Kevin became frequent subjects of photos during senior year.

An attempt at an artsy photo of those three.

I was taking a photography class and had to practice using a film camera. Those three would pose, or something like that, in the middle of classes. It was my job to hit up the darkroom and develop the foolishness that we created. To this day, Mike insists he wasn’t in any of those photos. The joke is on him, though. He has aged very well, so he looks almost the same today.

During high school, I was at the mercy of my bike, walking, or occasional rides to hang out with friends. I didn’t get my driver’s license until senior year, and even then I had infrequent access to a vehicle, what with me being one of five kids and having a mother working full-time and going to nursing school full-time.

It was a different era in the 1990s. You didn’t sit inside on a phone, playing video games, or watching television. Well, sure, we did all of those things to a degree, but for the most part life consisted of calling friends, quickly getting off the phone, and getting out of the house to have some sort of an adventure.

You quickly learn who your ‘ride or die’ friends are based on the level of stupidity they were willing to join you on. Wandering through the woods? Sneaking into a construction site to explore half-built houses? Hanging out of the back of a station wagon riding a skateboard? Drinking Jolt and creating caffeine-soaked skits with a bulky camcorder? These were only a few examples of what I’m talking about.

Yes, we drove something like this while someone rode a skateboard out of the back.

A classic ride-or-die story happened freshman year. Hasan and I went to a party at another friend’s house. It was in the next town over; we must have been dropped off there. It was populated by probably 8-10 more kids, but it was over thirty years ago, so my memory is hazy. What’s not hazy is how the party ended.

I am sure we were loud. I think there was at least some alcohol there, but I don’t think Hasan and I had more than a few sips at most. It was when the red and blue lights started flashing that we knew the jig was up. The police were there.

All of us 15/16 year old kids scattered. People were going in all different directions. Hasan and I though stuck together. One wouldn’t leave the other. We ran through yards, behind houses, tearing through trees and bushes until we were safely behind a nearby strip mall. It was part terrifying and part exhilarating.

At the strip mall, I called my mother to come and pick us up. We stood in front of a darkened store and waited, letting our heart rates come down. The fact that we hadn’t drunk worked in our favor. When my mother showed up, we didn’t reek of alcohol, so when we told her the story of what had happened, it was believable.

I feel like growing up in the 90s, I had a lot of near misses when it came to danger. I don’t think I’d have gotten in much trouble if the police had snagged me, but who knows? Being a minor, I knew I could do nearly anything I wanted with little repercussions.

That doesn’t mean that I went out defacing people’s property, or starting fights, or stealing. It just meant that the voice in my head telling me something was dangerous kept quiet a lot of the time. Maybe it wanted to see how I’d react to adversity?

I find it interesting that I didn’t go out drinking, or smoking, or partying until all hours of the night, and yet I feel my high school years were filled with adventure. That comes down to who my friend group was.

What the ‘cool kids’ would have thought of as adventures I saw as dangers not worth the time or risk. Now I can’t say for sure that if I was asked to go out drinking and partying and randomly hooking up that I would have said no. I can say that, looking back at the classmates who got DUI’s before they were of legal age and those who held their own children before holding a diploma, I am happy with my choices in friends and adventures.

I chose wisely when it came to friends. I also didn’t restrict myself to any certain subset of people. Only in the last few years have I noticed just how all-encompassing my friend groups were. Yes, I said ‘groups.’

I can rattle off a handful of different groups of friends. These had very little, if any, cross-pollination with other groups. I tried to be friends with anybody who wanted to be friends. It’s the way I was raised by my mother. I tried to fit in with anyone while also staying true to who I was.

Being seen as a poser is a kiss of death in any generation. If you lose your authenticity, you lose credibility. At least that’s how it was in high school. The way I navigated those waters was by amplifying traits around certain groups. I never hid who I fully was; I just shined a brighter light on the things I had in common with the people I was with at the time. Does that make sense?

I must have done a good job in my choices of friends because, as I said earlier, I still consider many of those same people my friends to this day. There are also no friends, not acquaintances but friends, that I regret knowing or having in my life. I think it’s rare to look at your friend group and not find someone who turned out to be a bad apple. I mean, unless we all were bad apples and none of us noticed the difference?

Friendships in high school changed and evolved along with all of us. You start with needing rides to someone's house to using your bike or your own car. Adventures go from walking to the corner store on a summer afternoon to driving to Boston for a killer, loud, AC/DC concert. Relationships could come and go, but friendships tended to stay.

A replica of my concert T since I have no clue where it is.

In my life today, I have more than a handful of friends of over thirty years. Now we don’t get to see each other all of the time due to work, family commitments, and location. That being said, if a friend reaches out to get together, I try my best to move whatever I need to see them.

I still remember inside jokes. I still remember certain foods certain friends liked. I still remember who was in what class. Mainly, I still remember how these people made me feel and why they became my friends in the first place. I think that is the most important thing.

Over time, specific memories might fade. That’s just the price of doing business in life. Feelings remain, though. If I hear any of a few dozen names from high school, whether they are still fixtures in my life or not, I get a smile and a blast of warm positive feelings.

We were all teenagers. We all went through the experience of finding ourselves in the world. If we are lucky, we have a solid crew of friends to navigate the choppy waters with. Very few grow up on one straight, clear path. It’s typically filled with twists, turns, dead ends, heartbreak, confusion, anger, and possibly, if a Gen Xer, indifference.

To wrap things up, I found one song that stuck out to me as far as my high school friendships went. Not surprisingly, it is a Red Hot Chili Peppers song. They were a band that made you cool if you listened to them, along with the Beastie Boys. At least it was in my circles.

The song is My Friends off of their less-than-stellar One Hot Minute album from 1995. The entire song weighs heavily on my memories of high school. The hook, I guess, is the lyrics I gravitated toward.

I love all of you
Hurt by the cold
So hard and lonely, too
When you don't know yourself




It’s a perfectly fitting sentiment. We were growing up, trying to find ourselves, but also knew that even as alone as you might have felt at times, if you were lucky, you had some friends to stand by you through those formative years.

In my next post, I will take a look at my family dynamic during senior year and a look at the role of family in the life of any high schooler. All families are created differently, as was mine.

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #124: Hearth n’ Kettle, Auto Acorns, Wild Kingdom, etc.

1. In the northeast, we have a restaurant chain called Hearth n’ Kettle. It’s got an old Colonial motif with classic New England fare. I remember many times going to the location in Yarmouth with family and loving it. A quick search says they originally opened in 1973 and at their peak had 6 or 7 locations. The last several years have been hard for Hearth n’ Kettle. There are only two active locations, with Yarmouth being seasonal at best. This week, when driving home, I passed by that location. In the parking lot was a bus and no other cars. People were standing around the bus, but there were no other cars in the lot. My guess is that they were being taken to Hearth n’ Kettle for dinner. Unfortunately, they are only doing dinner on weekends at this point in the year. I guess nobody bothered to call ahead to make sure they were open. That’s too bad. Papa Gino’s was right down the street, so they should’ve had no trouble finding dinner somewhere close by.

2. There is a trend going around with parents trying to recreate a ‘90s kid’s summer' in the present-day for their kids. I have seen a lot of people saying that just the fact that it is being meticulously planned is the first mistake. Having been a teenager in the 1990s I agree. My friends and I would meet up and just go where the wind blew. We’d take our bikes and not much else and figure things out on the fly. I get it that kids today can’t really just roam far away from home like we did back then. I also get it that today’s parents are those kids who grew up back then and they want to share the nostalgia with their kids. There has to be a happy medium. For a ‘90s kid’s summer’ day, it’s easy; it goes as follows. No phones, stay outside as much as humanly possible, and lunch or dinner must be either at the beach, in the car, or at a place with outdoor seating. Spend at least some time out in nature, even if this is just walking in a park or on the beach. Visit a place you’re familiar with but in a different way. For example, I had been to Pizza Hut numerous times as a kid, but it was a different time when my friends and I rode across town on our bikes to eat there. Luckily, I owned a camcorder back then and took copious amounts of videos of my 90’s summers. Here is a little slice of what it was like back then.



3. This week saw the official launch of the GoFundMe for my feature-length film debut, The Cabin. It is exciting and also nerve-racking. We have a modest budget goal for the film to pay for cast, crew, locations, props, and all of the post work. With roughly 2 ½ months until shooting, there’s plenty of time to get most or all of that goal. If worst comes to worst, my plan is to fill in the gap in the budget with my own money. I believe so strongly in the film that I am willing to put my money where my mouth is. I have wanted to be a filmmaker since I was in high school and spent my savings on a bulky Sears camcorder. Now, 30 years later, that dream is as close to being a reality as it has ever been. There is no way I will let that pass by. The Cabin is a suspenseful, psychological horror film based on a short story that I wrote over 15 years ago. If you can donate to the fundraiser, thank you. If you can’t, please share the link so that others might donate. Updates will be coming over the next several months.


4. Welcome to June in New England. You’d think that the month where summer starts would be filled with relatively warmer weather. For the most part, you’re right, until you’re not. On June 2nd, we woke up with a low of 37 degrees on Cape Cod. Not sure if that’s a record. Considering that because we stick out into the ocean, the temperatures on Cape Cod are usually warmer, I am guessing that places in northern New England must have had some temperatures dip below freezing. Luckily, looking ahead for the next two weeks, I don’t see anything close to those chilly temperatures returning. I’m not saying that I’m looking for temperatures in the 90s with high humidity, but after the winter we had in New England, I’d like to have some heat before the cold returns.


5. I didn’t expect the sense of panic that washed over me one morning this week when I grabbed my Fitbit off its charger only to find that the battery was nearly dead. As I stared at the screen with it reading 4% battery, I was freaking out. I need my Fitbit to track my calories burned so I know exactly how much I can eat for dinner. It’s not quite an obsession, but when you’re hurtling toward 50, tracking your fitness becomes more important. I mean, it should always be important, but when you’re in your 20s and 30s, time is on your side, and you have more room for error. That morning was a mashup of me charging the Fitbit in the car on the way to work and then sitting at my desk with it charging enough that I could wear it. I figured if I was just sitting there, I wasn’t accumulating steps or really burning calories, so I was safe. It turned out that I simply hadn’t secured the Fitbit to the charger, which was why the battery just died overnight. At least I hope that was it. There hasn’t been another issue during the week, so I think my nightmare of the dead Fitbit battery is over, but we’ll see. This is the true definition of ‘first-world problems.’


6. A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I decided to do a rebrand of my content creator page on Facebook. Instead of exclusively focusing on my podcast, I opened it up to everything that I do. Podcasting, while probably my favorite thing I create, is only a small piece of the pie. I also have had 10 books published, have written something like a thousand blogs, have created probably close to 800 YouTube videos, and countless photo and video posts on social media. I figured after all of these years, it might be wise to share all of what I do. It could lead to more followers. This week’s portion of this rebrand was changing my Patreon page. If you’re unsure of what Patreon is, it is a membership service where a creator in any field can garner subscribers, whether paying or free. It allows someone to support someone whose work they enjoy while, in turn, getting exclusive content or products in return. Anyway, changing your page can be risky because if someone has become a subscriber based on the podcast, they could see the change and think that I am totally scrapping what they became a member for. I created a short post explaining my choice, and hopefully, it will entice more people to come and join. Naturally, I have a link to the page here. No pressure to join, just check out the free tier.



7. I do quite a bit when it comes to creative work. Podcasts, videos, books, blogs, burgeoning film career, and even photography. Despite having a photo book, an Etsy shop, and having shared thousands of photos on social media, one thing I have never done is promote myself as a professional photographer. I mean, like the type who takes jobs shooting weddings and other events. So you’d imagine my surprise when out of the blue I get an email from a stranger asking about my availability to shoot a school reunion in the upcoming weeks. I will admit I briefly thought about accepting, but it came down to time and commitment. I don’t have the time in my schedule to take many hours out to prepare, scout, shoot, and then edit photos. I also just didn’t have the desire to open that door. I don’t have professional equipment besides my DSLR camera. I have no desire to spend boatloads of money buying the equipment I’d need, either. I referred them to a friend who is an actual professional photographer. I will do photo shoots for people, but only family and friends.


8. I used to be more handy when it came to cars. My first few autos I owned were older and often needed work. They lent themselves to being easier to fix, even if you weren’t knowledgeable. I knew how to do most things to fix those old cars. As cars got newer, they needed less work, and I found myself bringing them to mechanics for everything. I have had my current car for almost 12 years. It has 164,000 miles on it and still runs pretty well for an older vehicle. I’d also like to keep it running for 100,000 miles or more. I know I don’t have the skills to repair major issues with my car, but I figure smaller, simpler things I can handle. I decided this week to swap out my engine air filter. It’s very basic. You flip open a box, grab the old filter out, replace it with the new one, and close the box. The first rule of changing the air filter is to make sure you get the right one. No, not the one that will fit your vehicle, I mean the engine filter and not the cabin air filter. I got the wrong one by mistake and immediately had to go back to Auto Zone and replace it. Smart. Oh, but it gets better. I decided to just swap them out in the parking lot. I opened the hood and opened the black plastic box. I removed the old filter, but not before noticing underneath the filter, there was a pile of acorn shells. Nice. I am sure that’s been helpful for my airflow. While I was greasy and had the hood up, I opened the engine compartment. There, I also found some acorn shells. What the hell? Did a squirrel sabotage my car? Have I just not checked my car for so long that the occasional acorn shell got under my hood over the months and collected that much? I’ll have to pay attention if my car starts running smoother after removing those acorn shells. I feel like there would have been fewer of those acorns if I had found a car abandoned in a field behind a decaying barn.


9. There was a classic photo trip this week. My cousin Patrick is visiting Cape Cod from Las Vegas. Even though he had lived here for many years, there are a lot of places he’s unfamiliar with. I was tasked with finding some worthwhile places to shoot. It wasn’t hard. We stuck to the eastern part of the Cape, the towns of Brewster, Orleans, Chatham, and Harwich. I was actually surprised that there weren’t more people around because it was a mostly sunny weekend. We spent much of the afternoon cruising around getting great photos. Perhaps the best part, though, was at the end when I was dropping him off to get his car, and we sat and chatted for close to two hours. It was a fun talk about growing up, our family, and life in general. I think it was the first true, deep, long, drawn-out conversation we’d had like that. It was definitely a day I am so glad we had.

My cousin standing in the Chatham labyrinth.

10. The photo trip ended up being like an episode of Wild Kingdom. Oh sure, we saw the typical array of birds and loads of insects, but we also saw unusual animal guests during the day. First was a gigantic snapping turtle at the Stony Brook Herring Run in Brewster. A young couple asked if we had seen it, and so we rushed over to see a turtle in a shallow creek. This snapper had to have a shell that was a foot and a half across. I bet it weighed 30 pounds. I got some good video as I lowered my phone down using my selfie stick. Luckily, the turtle simply dropped its head below the water and didn’t try to snag my phone like it was a Ritz cracker. Next up was an eastern milksnake behind the Crosby Mansion in Brewster. It was lying in the grass, probably not expecting to have two people come walking up on it. The snake was probably four feet long and was blue and white striped. It slithered off into the brush, but not before I got a great video of it. Finally, at the Chatham Fish Pier, there were several gray seals. They are pretty common there now as they hover around the fishing boats after docking in the hopes of a stray fish being lost overboard. They are like 400-pound seagulls. That being said, the videos of them floating on their backs and looking like dogs make for easy content that people love.




11. It wasn’t all fun and games on the photo trip, though. Being early June, the bugs have started to take control. I have to make a choice when going outside, bug spray or sunscreen. I’m sure you could do both, but how much soupy spray do you want on yourself while trying to enjoy a day outside? I chose sunscreen. I definitely don’t regret it since I was outside for several hours and didn’t end up looking like bacon-wrapped lobster. While we were wandering the woods looking for a hidden cemetery in Harwich, I wished I had added a splash of bug spray. The mosquitoes were everywhere. My cousin was fine having used the bug spray. I got a few nibbles, but nothing prepared me for what awaited back in the car. As we pulled out of the trail parking lot, I could see a stray mosquito hovering around. It landed on my arm, and I knew I had it dead to rights. I gave it a smack. Yes, I killed it, but it also exploded in a ghastly spread of blood on my arm and hand. Here I am trying to drive while trying to clean someone else’s blood off my hand and arm. I was also trying to not smear blood on my steering wheel. It was some nasty stuff. Next time, I’ll create the mixed cocktail of sunscreen and bug spray.


12. Publishers Clearing House, it was not. This week, I got a letter in the mail from the Massachusetts Treasury Department. Excitement was in the air once I realized it wasn’t a bill. I was getting money back from the state. Now, to be honest, I already knew what was in the envelope. I had been on the Find Mass Money website as a person who had some cash owed to them. I believe that mine had to do with overcharging on an old, very old Sears credit card. My enthusiasm over the check I got was tempered a little when I saw the amount: $8.80. So yeah, no secret millions came to me. In fact, it isn’t enough to get a pizza, but it can be a down payment on one. I held out hope for a misprint, but sadly, it was just enough for two gallons of gas in this day and age.

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #118: Gurnet Trip, City Goose, Watch Your Ears, etc.

1. It’s probably been a year since I went on a true photo trip. Ironically, it started in the exact same way. My buddy Steve’s family has a summer cottage out on The Gurnet in Plymouth, Massachusetts. It has been in their family for over 130 years. The Gurnet is a private community and also a four-mile drive down Duxbury Beach. In the spring, Steve likes to bring some belongings up to the cottage as they prepare to open it up. I tend to tag along, as it is a perfect excuse for a photo trip. It also allows me access to Gurnet Lighthouse, which is at the point. I have been out there probably close to 10 times now, and every time I go, I get the same photo of the lighthouse looking back toward Duxbury Beach from atop an earthen fort. As much as I like trying to find different angles of photos, this one, for some reason, speaks to me.



2. The trip didn’t begin too early. I got up at 6am like I would on any workday. I made sure everything I needed was packed the night before, since it’s my thousandth photo trip or something like that. Of course, it wouldn’t be a normal trip without me forgetting something on my end. This time is was forgetting to charge my camera battery. You can’t blame me, though, as I hadn’t touched my camera since November when I shot my nephew’s Senior photos. Since then, it’s been in its bag collecting dust. It didn’t end up affecting the trip much though, since I was fully prepared to use my phone and selfie stick.


3. Speaking of that selfie stick, I put it to good use while driving the four miles out to The Gurnet. I rolled down the window and filmed much of the ride out. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary except for the other vehicle that came flying up behind us. I am sure they were either curious or irritated by me, who must have looked like some vlogger or influencer recording the drive out. Hey, I’m not famous, but I’m not above trying to get some good footage to try to go viral. I half expected them to follow us up to Steve’s cottage to yell at us for not going faster on the winding, holey, dirt road.


4. A usual spot we hit on the annual Gurnet trip is Gunther Tooties. It is a small bagel and coffee shop with five locations, typically located inside gas station markets. They have a bunch of different bagel types and cream cheese flavors. Each time I go in, I have no idea what I want. It’s like I need to learn what a bagel is or something. The toughest choice was the flavor of cream cheese. The girl at the register told me where the flavors were listed on the board. I saw chocolate chip and said I wanted that. Unfortunately, that was a bagel flavor as I was not reading the right list. Feeling a bit dumb, I think the girl could tell, and so she recommended honey walnut cream cheese to go with my French toast bagel. I agreed. As we drove off, it dawned on me that I believe that I get the same order every time, yet I go in the next time like it’s my first time. It’s like the mind eraser from Men in Black is located in the door as I exit.

The Plymouth location

5. I have wanted to go to Gooseberry Island in Westport, Massachusetts, for years. The main reason is a concrete observation tower from World War II. The island itself is 73 acres and has more than just the tower and the other smaller tower near it. However, I had tunnel vision and could not have cared less about the ocean scenery on either side of the walk out. The towers didn’t disappoint, despite being coated in graffiti. There were no secret entrances to either tower, although I might have been able to squeeze sideways into a narrow opening in the smaller tower. The piles of trash inside though, stopped any foolish ideas. It was while we were out at the towers that we noticed dark clouds increasing. As the sprinkles began to fall, I hesitated, hurrying back to the truck since there was an outside chance of a rainbow appearing. That became a running theme of the rest of the photo trip: hoping for a rainbow as it rained. There never was one.



6. Much like not being able to read the flavored cream cheeses at Gunther Tooties earlier, I had another ‘eyes playing tricks on me’ moment while leaving Gooseberry Island. I walked past a gray SUV that was covered in bumper stickers. I spotted one with a weird message in cursive on it. Now, after the fact, I realized that the sticker said ‘Kinda Sweet. Kinda Savage.’ What did I think it said? Kinda Sweet. Kindness Sausage.’ Is this the same as mishearing lyrics in a song? Someone needs to make that bumper sticker now. I had to laugh and then had a whale of a time explaining to Steve why I was laughing. Hey, they have ‘kindness rocks,’ why not kindness sausage?


7. One thing that you notice right away when driving around certain parts of the south coast of Massachusetts is that there is a lot of farmland. Like you wouldn’t expect that much. There are urban areas like New Bedford and Fall River, sure, but then there are stretches where it's wide open areas with cattle and rock walls. Towns like Westport, Dartmouth, Fairhaven, and Middleboro have a mix of both. You drive and see barns, silos, animals, and then a few minutes later, you’re on a main road littered with fast food and strip malls. Even on Cape Cod, we don’t have that much wide open space. Any farm down here is like pocket-sized. Don’t even get me started about how much different Western Mass is compared to the east. That’s mostly due to the Berkshire Mountains. The south coast of Massachusetts makes for a scenic, if not unexpectedly so, photography trip.


8. I love road trips. That being said, I also unfortunately get terrible car sickness. The same goes for boats. So, as much as I loved the idea of Steve driving the 200+ miles we ended up doing on the photo trip, there was also lingering dread in the back of my head. Would I get carsick? I always take Dramamine about an hour before being the passenger in someone else’s car. Sometimes it works great, other times not so much. The irony is that I feel fine when I drive. I have learned it’s because my brain is in control of anything from movement to acceleration, etc. That’s not the case when a passenger. We were out from just before 8am until close to 5pm on that trip, and I did well. Granted, I had my Dramamine, a few ibuprofen during the trip, and an extra hit of caffeine to stave off any nausea. I wasn’t taking any chances. I’d much rather just sit and be the passenger on any road trip, but due to motion sickness, I tend to be the driver the majority of the time. At least my car is great on gas.


9. Visiting Gooseberry Island was out of order for our itinerary. We had anticipated stopping first at Parsons Reserve in Dartmouth. It is a walking trail known for its incredible field of daffodils in the middle. I had ideas for photos and videos that were dancing in my head. Unfortunately, with it being school vacation week, loads of families had the same idea. We drove past the main parking lot. It was full, and they had security directing people. So we drove a few hundred feet to the backup lot. It was also full. That’s why we ended up at Gooseberry Island. Once we finished there, we headed back toward Parsons Reserve as the rain began to steadily fall. It was touch and go as far as bringing our cameras out there, but I said, since we were there, why not just give it a try? It wasn’t like we could just go back the next day since it’s about an hour drive for us. We wandered about ¼ mile to get to the daffodil field. Signs were telling you no professional photo shoots and no equipment. Little did they know my selfie stick was also a tripod, so joke’s on them. Even in the rain, there were probably 15-20 people wandering the rows of 27 different varieties of daffodils. Signs were telling you which direction to go, including one-way signs. Dogs and screaming kids were there as well, but I can always use editing techniques to get rid of those sounds when making videos. The rain fell throughout the time there, but it made for some cool ASMR videos. It is recommended to visit Parsons Reserve and the daffodils during the spring. If you’re going in the off-season, it’s not going to be anything special since the daffodils are the main attraction.



10. Fort Rodman and Fort Taber in New Bedford make up a historic site that I have been to many times. Rodman is a granite structure, while Taber is an earthen fort that is pretty creepy and also grimy when you step inside. Years ago, when I went there were holes smashed out of some of the lower-floor granite of Fort Rodman, which allowed you to see inside to an overgrown, creepy courtyard. Now those have all been sealed over. Still, there is a hole in the front wooden doors, so you still get a little bit of a view. I wanted a video walking through Fort Taber. Even though it’s a public area and the fort itself isn’t as big as it seems, I still made sure to wait to make sure a couple of people I saw weren’t going to follow me inside. I like the historic site, but some places in New Bedford are sketchy to say the least. This part of the photo trip ended with me walking a long concrete walkway to get a close-up photo of Butler Flats Lighthouse, located a half-mile or so offshore. Unfortunately, while standing all the way out there, I realized I needed to pee. It was doubly unfortunate because no bathrooms were open on the grounds. I briefly debated the pros and cons of peeing over the side into the ocean, but remembered the entire property was under video surveillance. That’s not the type of thing you want to be known for. I wisely held it in.

Looking toward Fort Rodman from atop Fort Taber

11. My saving grace was a Wendy’s in New Bedford. Steve wanted a quick bite. I needed a bathroom badly, and we both won. The standout moment from this part of the trip was not the fact that I resisted a spicy chicken sandwich and fries. No, it was a lone goose just relaxing in a small grassy area right off a busy street at the edge of the parking lot. Mind you, this is a highly developed section of New Bedford. There were no ponds nearby, hardly any trees. It was all busy streets and shopping plazas. This one goose was lying down, seemingly undisturbed by the number of cars, people, and overall noise. I thought about going over to try to get an up close photo of the city goose, but I figured it might end one of two ways. Either the goose gets mad and comes at me and I have to run away. Or the goose gets scared and flies into traffic and gets turned into a piñata for cars. That second one would, of course, lead to people looking at me for scaring an innocent goose. I decided to just let it be.


12. I created a retrospective video about the 6 weeks or so that the north side of Cape Cod was choked with ice back in winter. The irony is that I was holding off to make sure we had no chance of getting any more snow. I didn’t want to release it on YouTube and then have a freak snowstorm happen. I figured it would look like I jinxed us. Well, we didn’t get a snowstorm, but we did get a brief but intense hailstorm one day this week. The hail was smaller than peas, but it fell so intensely for 10-15 minutes that it made the ground white. So it might not have been a snowstorm, but it was close. Now I think we should be safe from freak spring snow (knocks wood).



13. Sometimes I have to stop and really appreciate how lucky I am. This is a two-part story. First, I was lucky that this week I got to spend some time hanging out and having fun with my 7-year-old niece, Sylvie. She is a bundle of energy and is already very sporty. So she wanted to be out in the yard kicking a soccer ball around. That’s easy enough for me. While running around and kicking, I stopped paying attention to my surroundings. That came back to bite me as I went running for the ball too close to a bush. In a one-in-a-million shot, one of the branches literally went right into my ear canal, slamming into my eardrum. It was a shocking pain, and I immediately grabbed for my ear. I was terrified that I had done permanent damage. The first thing I did was start snapping my fingers next to my ear to make sure I hadn’t lost my hearing. That was the other lucky part. I have no clue how close I came to bursting my eardrum and suddenly being partially deaf. All the while, I had to not let my niece see how much pain I was in. I just kept playing with her all the while checking my ear for any damage.


14. Humbled and grateful are the words I would use to describe my feelings after my first author event of the year. It was held at the West Dennis Library, not too far a drive for me. I was speaking about Cape Cod history and specifically my 10th book, In Their Footsteps: The Interesting People, Places, and Events of Cape Cod History. There has been loads of construction going on in West Dennis, and once I pulled into the library parking lot and saw that there was half of the parking lot was surrounded by a chain link fence, I didn’t have a good feeling about turnout. I was wrong. People filed in, and kept filing in. The staff had to grab several more chairs to fit the 30 or so people who came to hear me speak. The event went great, even if my voice started getting raspy. The fact that so many people came out to see me is something I will never take for granted. It still surprises me that I have people willing to take time out of their day to come to an event of mine. I do my best to make it fun, engaging, and interesting. I also sold a whole bunch of books, nearly my whole stock. It was a wonderful time, and I hope I can do many more of them this year and next.


15. Having worked as a trainer for 10 years and watched my overall health for a lot longer, I have tried everything. Any exercise, any class, any type of cardio, any diet, any supplement. You name it, I have tried it. I wish I could sit back and tell people, whether clients or just friends and family, that I had a cheat code for them to get in better shape (whatever that might be). The bottom line is that there is no cheat code. It comes down to consistency. It comes down to discipline. It comes down to diet. That doesn’t mean you need to eat 1,000 calories a day, do an hour of cardio, and lift for another hour 6 days a week. No, consistency means making a plan and sticking to it until it becomes a habit. One healthy meal doesn’t make you healthy. One lifting session doesn’t make you strong. One walk doesn’t give you S-tier cardio levels. I get it that getting into shape is hard, especially if you’ve been on the other side of that equation for a long time. I tell people to break it down into small, manageable goals. Eat well for a day, then another day, etc. Find 30 minutes to do some sort of exercise one day, then another day, etc. My only frustration comes when people ask me for advice, and I give it, and they ignore it because it’s not ‘oh snap your fingers and you’ll be where you want to be.’ Once you get people asking you for advice constantly for months, and you find yourself repeating the exact same stuff, it gets to the point where I just want to tell them, ‘you obviously don’t really want to get healthy, so go do whatever you think is right and stop wasting my time.’

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #116: Something Very Bad, 12 Seasons, A Cool Bike Rack, etc.

1. My latest binge-worthy show on Netflix is a recent addition to the platform. Something Very Bad Is About To Happen is a horror series created by Hayley Boston and produced by the Duffer Brothers. It is about a woman who is going to get married, but things start happening that kind of tell her maybe she shouldn’t marry into her future husband’s family. It just came out on Netflix in the last week or so. I already enjoy it. The show is pretty dark, moody, creepy, and atmospheric. I will do my best not to spoil anything. There are eight episodes, and it’s unclear if there will be a second season since it’s being promoted as a ‘limited series.’ Highly recommended if you enjoy psychological horror.

2. A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I had a man in the gym at work running on a treadmill in an active metabolic test. During that test, for some reason, the power in half of the gym suddenly went out. It was pretty dangerous since it immediately turned off the treadmill when it was going close to 8mph. Nothing had happened like that since, so I thought maybe it was a one-time anomaly. Nope. This week, it was a woman on the treadmill doing oxygen therapy. This is where you perform some sort of moderate cardio while breathing in 93% pure oxygen through a mask. I was in the middle of performing shockwave therapy on a patient's shoulder when I noticed all of the lights went out in the gym. This wasn’t part of the power; it was all of it. I had to ask someone else to go and check if the woman was alright. She was, but it was again very dangerous that the power just decided to go out. There was nothing different on our end, so it might be something that the owners of the building need to get taken care of.


3. It’s the time of year when the herring start making their journey from ponds to the ocean on Cape Cod. We have a few herring runs on the Cape. Perhaps the most well-known is the Stony Brook one in Brewster. It had been getting a major facelift over the past year, so it was unknown if it would be done and reopened in time for the annual explosion of herring through the waters. If you’ve never seen the herring run, think of it as thousands of 6-8” long fish trying to swim from a pond, down a series of fish ladders, and out to the ocean. Then imagine split rail fences on either side of the rushing water, lined with hungry gulls. It becomes a fight for survival with loads of fish being swallowed long before they reach their destination. This year, there is an added level of difficulty as osprey have joined the chat as far as grabbing a herring lunch. As of this writing, I have seen the herring, but seeing as how I drive by there daily on my way to and from work, I’ll be stopping in to try to get some footage of the impending massacre.

A wide view of the herring run.

4. In New England, we have a long-running joke that instead of 4 seasons, we have 12. This is based on the wacky ways our weather evolves over the year. As of this blog, we are about halfway through April. Several weeks into spring. Wherever you are reading this from, what is the weather like? Spring? Summer? Probably somewhere in there. We are currently in Third Winter, aka our 5th season of 12. Just this past week, we’ve had lows dip into the mid 20s and even had a few flakes in the air one day when the high didn’t even reach 40. I’m not saying I need it to be 70 instantly, but at least have it be in the low 50s consistently. Up next in our year in New England is The Pollening. I’m super excited for my allergies to leap out from behind a bush and whack me on the head like a mob hit. Anyway, you know I’d have the full 12 seasons of New England sheet for you.

5. Sometimes it’s best to keep things simple when it comes to exercise. I have a client at my job who is pretty hardcore. I enjoy being able to craft some elaborate, fun, and challenging exercises for her. Sometimes, though, I might take it a step too far in terms of complication. An idea I had this week was a sort of kettlebell drag. I took three yoga straps and tied them together before taking the end of the last one and tying it to a 26-pound kettlebell. The object is to use the straps to pull the bell to your feet. Then you’d walk across the gym and pull the bell toward you again, and so on. The apparatus was all set to go. I had been bragging excitedly about the setup to her. She grabbed one end of the straps, gave it a pull, and instantly, one of the knots I’d tied came undone. Fail #1. So I tied it back up as tightly as I could. She grabbed one end, gave it a pull, bam, another one came untied with a metal clasp, going flying. Fail #2. This time, she tied it back together. One drag of the kettlebell, and she said it wasn’t challenging enough. So I grabbed a thick band and proceeded to tie a heavier kettlebell to the 26-pound one. Again, overcomplicated. One last time, she grabbed the strap and gave it a pull. This time, the third and final yoga strap popped off with another metal clasp flying. We both laughed pretty hard...then she had to do sets on the battle ropes. So the joke ended up being on her.


6. Having a good edible means editing photos on your phone while simultaneously scanning the room, looking for where you put your phone. Not much else can be said about this. I indulge in an edible every now and then. Usually, I just veg out watching Netflix. I started editing photos from a little shoot I did, which is coming up next. I got so zoned out editing the photos that my mind began wandering to someone I wanted to text. I looked around for my phone so I could text, and it actually took me a minute to realize my phone was in my hands. Hey, at least I just stay home rather than subject the rest of society to my foolishness in that state.


7. I took a quick hop over the bridge to get some video at the nearby but remote Scusset Beach in Sagamore Beach. I began with my new favorite thing, using my selfie stick to shoot video out of my car’s roof while driving. That was fun, as was the walk out to the end of the jetty. Naturally, with my location at the Cape Cod Canal, I was able to watch a few boats go in and out, including a much bigger ship. One funny thing about Scusset Beach is that there is a very specific bike rack there that I am obsessed with. Every time I go, I stare at it and inevitably take a photo of it. I don’t know if it’s just the design of it, but it has been a thing of mine for probably 25 years. If I go to Scusset, I will end up gawking at that bike rack.

Almost hypnotic

8. I graduated from middle school (8th grade) in 1992. That was the last time I had been inside the halls of Mattacheese Middle School on Cape Cod. Until this week, that is. I was out for a long walk and ended up deciding to head over to Mattacheese, which was close to 3 ½ miles in each direction. The school itself is closed, although the gym and outdoor fields are still used for youth sports. I was there, and the gym was being used, so naturally I walked in. I was not able to go very far since the rest of the school was still locked. I did get to see the gym, the chorus room where I had music class, and use a bathroom, which was thrilling. Don’t worry though, I let the staff there know what I was doing, so I didn’t look too suspicious wandering down the halls.

Definitely don't look 14 anymore

9. This past week has felt like I am trying to get the train rolling down the tracks again after basically spending the last few months just trying to survive winter. There are so many projects I am working on, will be working on, or want to work on. It feels now like I need to take a step back and try to organize things and make a plan for the rest of the year. My mind is like a front yard after a storm, covered in branches and other debris. I just have to find a place to start cleaning up. I guess I didn’t realize how tough this winter was mentally until I sat down and tried to pick up where I left off with projects, and it was like chasing dandelion spores in the wind. Luckily, there’s no pressing deadline on any projects, at least for this month.


10. It’s amazing how you can fall out of the habit of something that was second nature for so many years. I was a regular at the gym from my college days. I remember working out in the highly retro gym at Cape Cod Community College. There was equipment that was 20 years old when I was going in the late 1990s. No matter what, though, I was at the gym working out 4-5x per week. Unless I was hurt or sick, I was a regular. Now, I have been working as a personal trainer for 10 years, and I find it harder than ever to keep up appearances at the gym. When exercise became work, it changed things. When I worked as a cook, I hated cooking at home. It became an extension of my job. Now with training, it’s becoming the same thing. I do it all day and rarely have the desire to do it again after work. I don’t think it’s all because I train people for a job. I am closing in on 50. My body has seen its fair share of injuries. I have lingering right hip and left knee issues from running, and no doubt am starting to feel the creep of arthritis in my left shoulder and right elbow. Plus, as you age, your energy levels naturally drop. It’s all stacked against me. That being said, I also know, because training is my job, that exercise is a positive solution to a lot of issues. I think this spring into summer will be a lot of me recalibrating what I am looking to do with myself at the gym. I can’t really run. I can’t really lift heavy. What I can do, though, is show up and keep moving.

The end of the jetty at Scusset Beach