Television Show Episode: "Chris Unfiltered"
Title: Snowball Fights and Stale Vomit
Genre: Comedy/Drama
Logline: Chris battles the chaos of a snowstorm, a hilariously slow day at work, and a series of misadventures that redefine the concept of a "bad day."
Act 1: Snowy Beginnings
The first snow of the season blankets the town, and Chris, our sardonic main character, trudges into work at a small diner where he's been employed since 1993. The diner is eerily quiet, and Chris notes that it’s the slowest day he’s ever seen—except for one in 2002 when a couple cross-country skied into the parking lot for breakfast.
Chris's co-worker, Tom, ribs him about his bad luck, joking, “You’ve got a talent for attracting weirdos in snowstorms.”
Act 2: A Symphony of Mishaps
With little to do, Chris tries to help out in the kitchen, only to cause a series of disasters:
- The Hot Box Incident: He puts a hot box in the dishwasher upside down, flooding the kitchen with water. John, the eccentric dishwasher, squeals in frustration, muttering in Creole while singing bass lines like lyrics.
- Salt Mismanagement: Chris uses three entire boxes of table salt on the walkway before Tom informs him about the rock salt. Chris mutters, "Guess our food costs will snowball too."
Act 3: Snow Shoveling and Strange Visitors
Outside, Chris struggles to clear the icy brick walkway with a warped metal shovel, repeatedly jamming the handle into his stomach. He mutters sarcastically, “Another win for modern tools.”
Later, as he’s salting the lot, two strange men emerge from the dining room. Chris panics, assuming a robbery is imminent, only to learn they’re photographers updating the diner’s website. He quips, “Good thing I didn’t grab the mallet… this time.”
Act 4: Pain and Peanut Butter
Back inside, Chris attempts to grab some peanut butter to fuel up, only to slam the 5-pound bucket on the counter, smashing his pinky. He winces, muttering, “Guess I didn’t really want it anyway.”
Tom laughs, reminding Chris of the time they used to pelt their former co-worker, a man resembling Drew Carey, with snowballs. Flashbacks show Chris misfiring a snowball that hits a clock, sending it crashing off the wall.
Act 5: Slippery Splits and Holiday Hopes
As the day winds down, Chris spots a car pulling into the lot. Wanting to avoid a customer interaction, he turns to dart inside, only to slip on the ice and fall into a near-perfect split. John squeals with laughter, making the moment even more humiliating.
That evening, Chris reflects on the absurdity of the day while sitting in his favorite chair. He jokes to himself about installing a dumbwaiter to hide in during slow shifts. Looking out the window at the falling snow, he wonders aloud, “Could tomorrow top this madness? Here’s hoping.”
Tagline:
“When life gives Chris snowstorms, he finds disaster—hilariously, of course.”
Check out Chris Unfiltered: Episode 1
