This is a weekly recurring series featuring 5 poems all written within the same calendar year. They capture a sense of what my life and my mind were like at a certain age. It will also show the evolution of my life, mind, and writing style. We have come back around to 1997 and 1998. I was in college and was 19 and 20 years old.
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No Two Are the Same
What is love? Can someone explain?
How does it let in the sun, but cloud our eyes with pouring rain?
Feel it, deep inside, is a warmth to heal the coldest soul.
Seal it, fate, stabbing pains conquer like a thousand steely thorns.
What is love? Can someone tell me?
How do we earn this gift, then piss it away as an excuse to get burned?
Calms you, soothes your mind, peaceful as a cool autumn wind.
Disarms you, drains our sight, violent as the weakness of sin.
What is love? Can someone open my eyes?
Where do we find the right to use it,
and then lose grip with the wrongs to abuse it?
Clears out, the darkness escapes, exposing the light we hide in our souls.
Fears shout, weakness comes forward to open wounds like the deepest black hole.
I know what love is. I’ll tell you it’s all that’s divine.
Contains the most sensual of touches, an inner beauty so fine.
Helps the helpless go on, makes the longest of waits seconds.
Holds us up high above the river, where heartache on the waves crest.
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Dream Catcher
Dream catcher, catch me a good life.
Dream catcher, bring me a good wife.
Dream catcher, show me the way home.
Oh please don’t let me live alone.
Dream catcher, come on and show me, all the things I’ve yet to see.
Show my eyes all I can be, all I need to be is me.
Dream catcher, don’t break my heart.
Just give me a beautiful place to start.
Dream catcher, capture a moment, in time to make me fly high above the clouds in the sky.
Dream catcher, solve my problems, give me the answers to questions why.
You’ve got to take my heart out from this world.
Take my heart to that one special girl.
Take my heart and fill it with love.
Take my heart, all I need to be is me.
Dream catcher, give me a sign.
Where I’ll be going in time.
Tortured spirit or kindly divine.
Dream catcher, I’ll know what’s mine.
Soft lights, gentle sound, perfect feelings all around, she is there, sweet love we’ll make.
Oh dream catcher, I never want to wake, I never want to wake, never want to wake
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Forget to Remember
Tide rolls, rolls away, pieces of life remain for strangers to claim,
you or I, we’re all the same.
Is my life to be collected and passed on, or swallowed back into the deep?
The sky closes in, perched above my head to steal the bits and pieces still yet unclaimed.
Don’t forget to remember, the pieces were once you, were once me.
Don’t forget to remember always I am here, pieces uncollected, memories reflected, mirror claims your face, time gets the rest of what’s left.
Wash away, a distant face, clear to gray now out of place.
Once I was a man, footsteps marking the earth,
now my existence is inked with papered words.
When you arrive with me don’t forget to remember all glittering stars fade away,
the most concrete wishes are turned to clay.
Don’t forget to remember, always I am with you.
Blinded eyes see through time, these invisible hands will hold you when you cry.
Don’t forget to remember to look for me in the sky.
Dry up tears of grief, pain will leave when memories return to claim their space.
Will I be remembered here and now for then,
can you keep me alive through smiles and laughs of things I did back when?
When I am gone don’t forget to remember, sunshine, blue sky, who loved you, and why.
Don’t forget to remember not to cry, I see you, live you, breathe you from here.
Give a chance to playing the game of life again,
play for keeps don’t look back for an answer placed right before your eyes.
Don’t forget to remember me, and you’ll know why.
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Miss You
Sometimes I wonder how you are at night. Do your brown eyes still shimmer like they’re absorbing the moonlight? Do you think of me, do you wonder if I’m all right? You always seemed to know me best, every beat of your heart I felt in my chest. I would give anything to see you again as a hovering shadow as the sun parts the waves of the sea. Flash a mirror smile toward me, it’s the very essence of all I’ll ever be. You can turn on the light in my heart with beauty that can bring a tear to my eye. I don’t remember, where the colors changed from right to wrong. I’d never felt good enough for you all along. I found myself in what you told me, saw for the first time with the love you showed me. Enlightened in sorrow, cleared out for tomorrow, but I guess you like it in there.
I wish you understood, if you could hear my thoughts when I’m alone. Hear my begging and my pleas, hopes and dreams, and the one image in which I still believe. I must love you because it burns me black that you’re not here. To know you deserve something better, to know I need someone like you, to believe so deeply you’ve found the one and still be turned away. Peace, love, and happiness are all I want for you to feel. I’m tired of being down, beating myself up for being scared. I’m tired of being alone. Without you I’m not all I could be. I’m lost and you’re the guide. We need each other, need to find each other, hold on to each other, through the night and beyond.
I need to say I miss you until I’ve gone numb from heartache. I wish you were here now, I let this happen it was my mistake. You need to know that wherever you go you can always call on me and I’ll be there. I pray until the words grow old, pray you will catch wind of these cries. See through the shield of insecurity, catch sight of my heart and soul’s purity. Most of all I need to say how much I love you. It’s more beautiful than a pearl from the deepest ocean floor. I need you. You’ve captured my all and everything too and there’s nothing I want more. I want you. I’d forget the past and remember nothing but your love and feel as wealthy as a king in a golden castle. We need each other, as we are two halves of the same one. There’s a chance, for you and me, for us and all we’ll ever be. A heartbeat in two rhythms. There’s hope, we’ll be together, as one, no pressure, you deserve only all I can give. No fear, no lies, just you and I, no reason for goodbyes. Just the thought of you lying next to me gives me all I need to be alive.
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