Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog #125: Class of 96, More Mall Dreams, Too Hot, etc.

1. It’s hard to believe that it’s been 30 years since I graduated from high school. At times, it feels like yesterday. That might be helped by the fact that I have the entire ceremony on video. I can see my old friends and classmates when we were all teenagers with our lives ahead of us. I can feel the promise of the years to come and not the weight of mistakes, missed opportunities, and ‘what ifs.’ I remember not realizing just how big a change was coming as I crossed the grassy field and took hold of my diploma. I think I was just itching to get out of the dress clothes on a warm late spring morning. Then again, way more often I feel like that day was a lifetime ago, and in many ways it was. I am now in my late 40s and most of the time feel as though I must have missed my exit on the highway we were all traveling. My mission now is to either find my way back to that missed exit or to keep going until I find something that makes the missed opportunities worth it. Yes, 30 years is a long time. I do know that I have many years left to fulfill the promise I saw lying ahead of me when I first held that high school diploma in my hand. Don’t get me wrong, I have seen a lot and done a lot in the last 30 years, but I feel it’s like comparing the sales of Michael Jackson’s Bad album to his Thriller album. Most musicians would kill to have an album sell like Bad, but only one in a million can sell like Thriller. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone but me.


2. I guess I shouldn’t expect too much from people. I put together four polls for my upcoming 250th podcast episode. I’m calling it Listener’s Choice because obviously, the people listening will choose what GenX nostalgia topics are on that particular show. I had people ‘liking’ the posts but not voting in the poll. How stupid is that? It takes literally the same time and effort to click one of the poll options as it does to ‘like’ it. I am grateful to the people who understood the assignment, and the podcast will be a good one. The others, though? It’s like they’re children getting mad at being asked (nicely) to do something to help out around the house. Don’t tell me to pick up my room, I’m going to make a bigger mess! Seriously, I was tempted to block everyone who liked the polls but didn’t vote, and I know because the polls show me each vote and by whom. But going back to the top, I guess I shouldn’t expect too much from people. That’s on me.

Coming soon!

3. It’s funny how a major anniversary or milestone can affect your mind. I mentioned the high school graduation anniversary. That same day was Monday Runday, which some of you might remember as the weekly meetup with my longtime friend and old classmate Mike. We run, or in my case, mostly walk, at a local track. I haven’t run much in the last few months as my left knee has decided to retire early. That changed this week. Perhaps I was inspired by the weather? No, it was the fear of being old. I decided to run more than I have in a while at the track. Now, granted, it was not much, but still good enough. Just the thought of it being 30 years since I finished high school was enough for me to need to prove to myself I wasn’t old yet. My body felt relatively good the next morning, so who knows, maybe I can slowly return to more running. Or I’ll end up crashing out the next time, and I’ll soon be walking with those Nordic walking poles.


4. My sister Ashley passed 14 years alcohol-free this week. If it sounds like a big number, that’s because it is. It was a hard road for her leading up to the choice to quit. There were times when it was really bad that some of us in the family thought the alcohol would be the end of her. But she defeated her demons and became stronger. She defeated her demons and became an inspiration to me. When my alcohol problem was out of control, I looked to her and thought if she could do it, so could I. For me, it will be 6 years without alcohol in September. There have been a few times when the alcohol nearly reentered my life, most specifically the death of my Uncle Eric. I remember that not only am I not drinking anymore for myself, but I am also doing it for Ashley because she impacted me greatly with her own battles. While I am speaking on deleting alcohol from lives, I want to mention another sister, Kate, who is rapidly approaching 300 days, and then a year, alcohol-free as well. Everyone’s journey and reason is their own, but I hope that Ashley and I helped to show her that it can be done. I am very proud of my sisters.


5. For the 3rd time in probably 6 weeks, I had a dream featuring me with a friend or family member hanging out at the mall. This time, I was with my oldest friend, Barry, just wandering the corridors and chatting. Why? Not why is Barry there. That makes sense because I haven’t seen him in a few years, and he has been a hugely important part of my life for 40 years. No, the question is why at the mall always? Am I supposed to go to the Cape Cod Mall and find some sort of answer to something? Do I miss being a semi-pro mall rat in the 1990s? Is it more about the people in these dreams and maybe needing to reach out to them more? I have no clue. Have any of you had a sort of recurring dream, or at least a recurring dream location? I have vivid dreams and lucid dreams, but they are rarely ever connected. I tend to have wild swings of plot lines of my dreams. Having hangouts at the mall come around 3 times in less than 2 months is weird. Especially specifically remembering them. I guess we’ll have to wait for the next episode of Dream Mall: The Series to find out what happens.

The mall of my dreams?

6. All it took was a few 85-degree and humid days for me to immediately begin dreaming of the fall. The irony is, it’s not even summer yet. The first day of summer is June 21st. The heat is one thing. I’m not a fan of the temperatures getting above 80, but you can cope when it’s not humid. That’s the thing that is the worst. The humidity just makes everything feel wet and soupy, which is uncomfortable during the day and just plain gross at night when you’re trying to sleep. I try to wait as long as I can to put in my air conditioner. I only have two windows where I live. Plugging one with a bulky a/c unit means that on days when the a/c isn’t needed, I don’t get any fresh air. This is another first-world problem since many people don’t even have the option of air conditioning. It is supposed to become nice and seasonable again in a few days. I’ll likely be able to hold out for a while longer but there’s only so many days when the ‘real feel’ is 100 that I can endure before the a/c goes in.


7. As luck would have it, a window fan I had for many years finally decided enough was enough. It died and left me roasting during the heat wave. I took a trip to the nearest Ocean State Job Lot to get a good, and cheap, replacement. This fan was a powerful window fan, and I was happy that it was relatively affordable at $40. I got home, and it was 85 and humid inside my apartment, so the fan was going to be a welcome addition. I put it in a window and turned it on, nothing. I was confused. I tried different outlets. I messed with the power switch. Still nothing. Now I was mad because even though the prices are pretty low at Job Lot, you still expect something to work when you get it home. I began getting the packaging together since I’d have to go back and get a replacement. I was angry and pouring sweat in the heat. Then I turned the ‘thermostat’ dial in the middle of the fan. Suddenly, both 9” fans sprang to life loudly and powerfully. It turns out the thermostat is really just an intensity dial for the fans. With it being turned all the way down, the fans wouldn’t move. Yes, I did feel pretty stupid. I will say this, though: better to feel stupid at home than to go back to Job Lot and have them find out I was returning a fan because I couldn’t figure out how to turn it on.


8. I have seen birds do some incredible stunt work when it comes to flying. The way they can change directions on a dime is pretty amazing. I see it a lot when they fly in front of vehicles, yet they can change directions to avoid getting hit. This week, I saw the ultimate in terms of bird acrobatics. I was behind an SUV when a bird came flying in from the left. I think it was a robin, or at least a bird of similar size. This bird flew in between the SUV’s driver’s side tires. You’d figure any animal that gets in between the tires of a moving vehicle is likely not going to survive. This bird not only flew between those tires, but it also managed to instantly cut a corner and fly out between the rear tires and off to safety. I have no clue how it survived. If they have a bird lottery, I hope that one went and bought a ticket because it had luck on its side. Who knows, though, maybe it used up all of its luck and immediately flew into a mailbox or something.


9. I canceled my subscription to a television show pitch website. I had written out a full treatment for a season of a show based on my experiences working in restaurants in the 1990s. I mentioned it many weeks ago in this blog. I’m not done pitching the show. I am just looking for alternatives that don’t cost me $39/mo. with no promises of any views on my work. I went and canceled the membership with a few days left on it. For some reason, a notification popped up saying that my membership would end on December 31, 1969. Yes, you read that right. Apparently, my subscription to that site somehow made its way onto Doc Brown’s DeLorean and was deposited in the past. Maybe that will be my next TV show pitch. I stumble upon a tear in the space/time continuum thanks to my subscription to some random pitch website. On a more serious note, what does that say about their website? If you cancel and it gives you a cancellation date over 50 years in the past, what other mistakes have they coded into that site? Maybe I got out just in the nick of time?

Soon to be delivering my cancellation notice.

10. Every now and then, the old me shows up in terms of exercise. I can’t run really much at all anymore. I have nagging joint pains creeping up more and more, so lifting is less fun. I do the best I can, but there are days when I feel like the best is behind me. This weekend I was feeling lazy. Oh, I spent hours writing, so I was productive, but I ate terribly for lunch and had no desire to do anything. Then the heat wave we have been having got to me. It was 85, and I was sweating. This irritated me. I decided if I was going to sweat, I could at least turn it into an exercise session. So out of nowhere, I got into workout gear and went out for a walk. Now, mind you, it was 3pm, 85 degrees, and I had eaten junk and been sitting around all day. My body survived almost 4 miles before it began to shut down. I would not be denied. I pushed through 5.3 miles, burning 715 calories, erasing the bad lunch, and coming in under my calorie limit on MyFitnessPal. It might not have been as dramatic as the Knicks 29 point comeback in Game 4 of the NBA Finals this week, but it was a nice come-from-behind win for the day. I hope that it turns into some momentum so I can start feeling like my younger self. I’d take even feeling like 42 at this point. Oh, and also congratulations to the New York Knicks on winning their first NBA championship in 53 years.

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog: #58 - Hackers, Silverware Mining, 'Free' Money, etc.

1. I woke up one morning this week with an email from 4:30am sending me the authentication code I had requested for my Microsoft account. Too bad I was asleep and didn’t recommend it. So basically some suck bag was trying to get into my account. Unfortunately for them, they didn’t realize I had the two-factor sign-in. I usually find that process annoying. I mean who wants to sign in twice to get into an account. Now? Well, it’s still irritating, but haha stupid hacking scum you’re not getting my 5,000 Microsoft Rewards points!

2. From where I live, within 5 miles of me, there are 6 CVS and 7 Dunkin’ Donuts. I don’t live in a busy city. I’d say it’s a bit excessive. Oh, and there are also 5 dollar stores of varying chains within 5 miles. Just a series of random facts I felt like sharing. Not sure what it says about my little section of Cape Cod.

Everywhere I go there they are.

3. I went for a long walk, over 5 miles. Before I even went to shower I drove to the store. I figured I’d get things done in one fell swoop. I ended up talking on the phone with a friend for 90 minutes while in my car. That meant that by the time I got out of the car to go into the store, my legs had severely stiffened up. My walking was not graceful. Unfortunately, I got out of my car at the same time as an older man who also had trouble walking. I had to step it up and walk through the pain just so I wouldn’t make him think I was making fun of him. Good times.

4. I have always had a problem being a people pleaser. I tend to want everyone to like me. This can manifest itself as me not knowing how to set proper boundaries. I’ve been getting better in 2025. This includes no longer doing author speaking events unless they are paying (yes I would do events for free as a favor to local establishments). Another is knowing when to not give an inch for someone to then take a mile. Free time is your time, not availability time. Being a people pleaser is rough when you’re creating content because the more views or interactions you get the more likely it is that you get people who don’t like your work or are just jerks. It’s still a work in progress.

5. It’s always a fun time when you get a letter from the Treasury Department. Deep breath though as it was actually a check reimbursing me for a tax return in 2018. It wasn’t a big check unfortunately but free money (hopefully) is always a good thing. Thanks, it at least bought me dinner and a slipcover for my easy chair. Yay, adulting!

6. Speaking of that slipcover I went to Job Lot to get it since it was pretty cheap. While I was wandering around the store looking for it, since I am a guy and won’t ask for help, I noticed an old lady rifling through the bins of loose silverware. I must have done 3 laps around the store and each time I came back to where she was she was arm deep in spoons and forks jingling them around. No idea if she found what she was looking for in those bins but I got the slip cover.

Not sure if this was her plan for the silverware.

7. At the grocery store I had a moment where I was glad my mind usually is three steps ahead. I got finished at self-checkout and was heading to the exit. My eyes spotted a familiar face. It was a man I had briefly worked with several years ago. My first instinct was to go and say hi to him. Within an instant, I remembered how he loved to talk. My mind went to getting stuck in a 20-minute conversation with a guy I hardly knew inside this supermarket. In the end I didn’t make eye contact and I headed for the exit with no conversation. I think I made the right choice.

8. I can tell that I have been in hibernation mode over the last several months. That is because I can fill up my car’s gas tank and not have to fill it again for 2-3 weeks. Granted that’s helping to preserve the life of my car which is at 150K miles, but I can’t wait for spring so I can do way more traveling.

9. I’m not anti-social but I won’t lie, I do prefer not speaking to strangers rather than speaking to them. I’ll smile and nod or say hello as I pass but I am not one to strike up a conversation. A funny thing has happened the last 4-5 times I’ve gone to a local Seasons(Shell). They have 1 self-checkout next to the register. Totally by coincidence, I’ve gotten in line with someone in front of me and no one at self-checkout. Naturally, I go to that. I have been able to get in and out without uttering a word which is all good by me.

10. Saving money is always good. This is the first week of March. I can say it’s the first month in probably 7 years I haven’t had a credit card payment. It’s also the first month of my new car insurance policy where I will save nearly $500 annually. It’s not major stuff but saving every little bit counts so yeah I’m happy.

It's not like this, but still saving money is great.

Initial Impressions 2.0 Blog - #48: Christmas Tree, Old TV, Dolphin Noises, etc.

1. I finally got myself a little Christmas tree. How I got it was a process. I can’t fit a regular 6-foot where I live. Plus I don’t want all of the clean up so I wanted a small artificial one. Going out less than 2 weeks before Christmas to find a tree was a challenge. I ended up visiting several stores over a few hours. I was hell-bent on getting a tree that night so I ended up with a 3-foot artificial tree from Ocean State Job Lot. It’s small and thin but it fits exactly what I wanted. Think of it like Charlie Brown’s tree, except artificial.

2. I ordered copies of a Christmas card I made to give to family and some friends from Walgreens. Their website said they’d be ready in about two hours and I checked the box to get a text or email alert that they were ready. I went to the gym to kill time and then headed to Walgreens where my cards were ready. All good. The next day more than 24 hours after I placed my order I finally got the text from Walgreens telling me my cards were ready. I was tempted to go in and ask for them and play dumb but I decided to be a good boy.

3. I decided to get rid of my Nana’s old CRT television as I mentioned last week. It was still working and even had the remote. I left it by the road with a ‘free’ sign on it and figured it would be taken within hours. Wrong. I guess with flat-screen TVs being affordable nobody wants to lug a 50lb, 20-year-old CRT television home that they found on the side of the road. I gave it a few nights which consisted of me getting home from work after dark, hiding the television behind some bushes, wrapping it in a tarp and bungee cord, and then moving it back to the road before I left for work. In the end, I paid to take it to the dump, boooo.

This was basically what I was doing(AI)

4. For Christmas gifts I ordered a few gift cards from a local movie theater in the town of Chatham, Massachusetts. It’s about 20 minutes from me. Being lazy I had them mailed to me. The interesting thing is that when the cards *finally* arrived they had a postmark from Providence, Rhode Island. That’s nearly an hour and a half from me. It must just be protocol but seriously there’s no way to send something local in the mail without it going 5x as far away from me? Oh well, I can’t complain since they at least arrived before Christmas.

5. One of the funniest and most wholesome things I’ve seen in a while happened late in a shift at my day job. A man came in with his daughter who was probably about 4. She was super cute and not shy at all. As they were checking out he mentioned that one of her new favorite things to do was laugh like a dolphin. She then proceeded to make loud dolphin noises (think Flipper for those old enough). The sounds echoed off the walls and I had to walk away to laugh. I didn’t want to encourage her. The dad seemed a bit embarrassed but he never said anything to her because I don’t think he wanted her to feel bad which was really nice.

6. During a walk around the supermarket there was Christmas music playing and holiday decorations everywhere. It was a very fun and festive atmosphere. I had the biggest smile as I walked around and I figured a lot of people assumed I was enjoying the holiday season. I didn’t want to ruin the illusion but little did they know I was so happy because I found the horseradish sauce I wanted. It’s not as magical as the holidays but I’d be happy with it under my tree.

Yay, horseradish sauce!

7. We got the first snowfall of the season on Cape Cod. I’m not as big of a fan of snow as I was when I was a kid but the first snow is always fun. I grabbed my camera and headed out. I stopped at one particular spot in Dennis, the next town over. The photos and video were great but the roads got bad fast. Driving a Toyota Corolla means more than a little snow makes it a bad time. The last mile or so of my drive home saw me barely able to get to 20 mph as the roads were packed with slushy snow. My traction control light was on almost nonstop. As much as I loved the photos I was glad to get home in one piece.

8. My sister Ashley has a dog named Buddha. He’s a mix of a lot of things but looks mostly like a fluffier German shepherd. A fun fact is that he will not sit on any couch with her. In fact, he will get off the couch if she tries to sit with him. I say this because he goes out of his way to sit with me on the couch at my mom’s. This week not only did he lie down next to me but he fell asleep. To top it off he let me rest my arm on him like a big old rug. It shocked my mom and sister mostly because if she tried to sit next to him and pet him he’d walk away. She says it’s because he’s suspicious of her that she’s not petting him but checking for problems because she’s his parent.

9. A recent thing I’ve noticed on social media, more specifically Threads, is an influx of polite bots. They’re either bots or incredibly stupid people. I’d like to think bots. For example, I went and got a nice video of a church in the falling snow. There were wreaths, a manger scene, and a decorated Christmas tree under a gazebo. A comment on the video mentioned nice ‘traditional religious decorations.’ The kicker was when they asked if I had built them myself. Did I build the church and gazebo? Another one a few weeks back asked if I had built the boat I got a video of that had a small Christmas tree in it. Mind you I put a caption of where I was and what I was filming and the comments basically reworded my caption into question form. I’m hopeful these are bots because if it’s real people I mean wow stupid times a million.

Someone asked if I built all of this.

10. As Christmas draws near I am back to debating whether I should bother wrapping gifts or use bags. There was a time for a few years when I’d pile presents for the family into one big bag and hand them out because I just didn’t want to spend the time to wrap them. I guess I figure that the wrapping paper is wasted energy since very very rarely in my life have I ever heard someone rave about a gift wrapping job. That being said I do have my wrapping paper and tape ready so I guess I’ve answered my own question.