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Thursday, November 21, 2024

1997 My Life In Poetry Form - Throwback Thursday

 


This will be a weekly recurring series featuring 5 poems all written within the same calendar year. They capture a sense of what my life and my mind were like at a certain age. It also will show the evolution of my life, mind, and writing style. This is 1997. I was in my first year of college and was 19 years old.


Black


Black is emotion, heartless, and cruel

Black is when the darkness of night rules

Black is the soul of a wanted man

Black is the tires on a junkyard van

Black is emptiness, when there's nowhere to go

Black is fear before the big show

Black in your eyes when only hatred remains

Black, to help block out the pain

Black is not just a color, it's all rolled into one

It's looking down the barrel of a loaded gun

In sickness and health, through pleasure and pain

The blackness when you shut your eyes, still remains the same


Eye of A Killer


Shadows bend and shake under the merciless weight

Playing the role of murdered souls grasping in vain at the stabbing pain

Cutting like a knife it pierces your skins nerves

Howling with pleasure, giving what we deserve

Not a trace of life to be seen in the terror, of debris and dust now choking the air

Can patience and luck come along to save you

Stay hidden and quiet, it’s the only way to survive

Powerful jaws to pry open hiding spots like tin cans

Fear, but respect it, just try to understand

That only time can heal the wounds that were opened,

by a killer unseen yet never outspoken


Floating


As I step outside I feel the sun’s rays melt on my face. I’m so happy being alive, being in this place, just as I am now. Peace and love lift my humble wings and carry me above the trees. I don’t ever want to come down, I think I’ll stay as long as I please. Floating on the wings of dreams higher than the clouds. Floating up into the sky never again touching the ground. Floating drifting over the troubles, pain, and sorrow. Keep on soaring higher past today and tomorrow. I can float forever knowing I’m with you.

I wander about, my toes tickled by stardust. Looking to the heavens to thank God I’ve made it at last. No more hurt and suffering, I won’t allow them to return with me to the earth below. I’ll just keep floating away, away until they’re out of sight. Floating, say you’ll stay with me for more than just one night. Floating, let all else drift away as long as I feel all right. Floating, negatives fall, the stars dying in the darkened sky. I’ll live by the light of the positives. Energized and alive, a second chance is what I’ve found in you.

I made it to the Promised Land just in the nick of time.
Joy and hope my friends were waiting for me to arrive.
I’ll never go, I’ll never leave, I love it here, love to just be.
Floating, going to live for now to hell with tomorrow.
Floating, watching the unsaved like meteors burn on impact.
Floating, give faith and caring to the ones most in need.
You’ve got to love, love to just be.

Love to just be, cherish the little things.
Love to just be, no matter what tomorrow brings.
Love to just be, give hope and faith to those you love.
Love to just be.

Open the Door


Face your fears, there’s no way around it.
You can’t keep hiding, waiting for the pain to quit.
Now and only now, can you stop this thing forever.
It’s on your shoulders, up to you, it’s now or never.
A fear that consumes, is a fear that destroys.
It eats at your soul and paralyzes the mind.
Looking for solutions, but they’re so hard to find,
have it your way, peace will be nonexistent.
Could you explain your reasoning, why are you so persistent?
Taken over, possessed by fear, touched by the devil.
Insane yet a genius, sloping mindset, yet still quite level.
When you stop your fight, you end your life.
Fear will cause reactions, to an extent not realized.
Do what must be done to end this battle in your head.
It can happen, it must happen for your own sake, 
stand up and fight, or be left for dead.
The pain and suffering will not bring any rewards.
Falling over the edge, what you’re leaning towards?
Why can’t you just see the light that shines bright in your face?
When you run with the devil and cheat on life, 
it’s death that wins the race.

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